Step 1

That's where I am right now, and quite frankly, it is where I need to stay.

"We admitted that we were powerless over alcohol and our lives had become unmanagable."

I've been there before. Thought I got it, but eventually let go of it.
How could it be the alcohol making my life such a mess?
It was my friend. It could take away all of those things in my life that I didn't want to feel....
I didn't want to be some alcoholic freak who could never have a drink!

Alas, my extended research has shown me that that is exactly what I am.
Sure, sometimes I stopped at just one, but when I was finished, I started obsessing on the next one, even if it was to be a week or a month later.
The gaps became shorter to days, then hours...
It led me to people, places and things that left me wondering where the me that I used to be had gone...

And so, here I am at step 1 again. I won't rush forward. I will grasp it. Accept it. Do what I must to hold on to the me that I nearly lost...